Saturday, 13 October 2012

From Dead to Teen in 13yrs...

I realise that the title of this post seems a little morbid.. It's not meant to be but it is somehow, very apt. You see, my Boo has just turned 13. This may not seem very interesting or exciting for you but to me it's very emotional. My pregnancy wasn't a very easy one or a very loving one, "Him in doors" & I had a lot of stress in our lives from his ex wife, which made what should have been the happiest time of our lives, sad & stressful. I had always imagined pregnancy to be so romantic.. Holding hands while shopping for baby bits, cuddling & talking to the bump... You know, like they do in romantic films. But for us, this wasn't the case, we argued A LOT, we didn't go shopping together, we didn't cuddle & talk to the bump, in fact, we didn't spend much "Quality time" together at all. All the stress was obviously to much for me as Boo came early... 9wks early & as you can imagine, this was scary... It was my first child & I didn't know what to expect but I was pretty sure, this was not IT...

We went to the hospital & I was rushed into to surgery as I was hemorrhaging. I remember all of what happened but after they took her out of me, they took her to SCBU & once back on a ward I was given a picture of her. I lost it, I screamed at the nurse, threw the picture back at her, told her I didn't want a photo, I wanted my baby... Demanded that they took me to see her. They told me that I couldn't see her until I had eaten & the feeling in my legs had came back.. I slammed my legs up & down on the bed & they were obviously worried about the damage I could do as they gave in & took me down to see her.. She was so tiny.. 3lb 2oz, covered in fur, no eyelashes, no finger or toe nails, she was just like a little squirrel monkey... I was IN LOVE... MY Baby... (I'm crying as I type) she was perfect & I had made her...

Over the next couple of days, I had to stay in hospital but I was allowed down to see her when ever I wanted but with somebody to take me in a wheel chair. On the third day, I had woken early, showered & waited for "him in doors" to come & take me to see my precious little bundle, but we were told we couldn't go in, something was wrong, we sat outside not knowing what was happening... My heart was in my throat. Finally they came out to us & told us that Boo had stopped breathing... I burst in to tears but was quickly reassured by the doctor that she was fine & that they had put her on a C Pap..

The next couple of weeks were hard, she stopped breathing 3 more times. The doctors sat with me & explained that her lungs hadn't opened properly & that they were keeping an eye on her & that they were doing everything they could... After this, she seemed to improve, so much so that they told me that I could possibly take her home on my birthday. I was so happy.. The next morning, I went to Mothercare, I walked around the shop with a huge smile on my face, pointing to this buggy, that cot, the sales girl telling me that they could have them delivered before she came home.. Then my mobile rang, it was an unknown number, I answered the call & my world came crashing down around my ears... It was a nurse from SCBU, they aren't allowed to ring parents if anything is happening but she was a friend... I ran as fast as I could to the cab office next door, I was crying & couldn't get my words out, I asked for a cab & the man on the switch board told me that he had no cabs, I collapsed, in a crying heap, he came around to help me up & I explained, the best I could, that my daughter had stopped breathing & he picked me up & quickly ushered me to his car & told me that he would take me.. He rushed to the hospital & as I tried to take my money out he just pushed me & told my to run... I ran as fast as my legs could carry me... The look on the nurses faces said it all... They stopped me going into the Warm room..(still crying as I type) I screamed & I'm sure I started shouting, no, calling her name, then all of a sudden, there was a flurry in the warm room.. The doctor came out smiling, shaking his head. Boo had started breathing again, kicking & waving her arms.. He told me that they were going to have to do test though as she had "died" They would have to check her brain or something like that, to be honest, I wasn't listening, I was weeping & thanking "God". 10 days after this, I was allowed to take her home... but thats another story..

The next 12yrs & 9 months have gone relatively easy compared to that...

So, now you see, from Dead to 13... Wednesday was Boo's 13th Birthday & a very emotional day for me... I honestly thank my lucky stars that I still have my Boo in my life, I am also lucky enough to have two more babies.. My "Princess" & my "Monster"

Wednesday, 29 August 2012

U.D.I's.. (understanding Debbie's injuries) Lol

So, I have told you before about my Northern Bessie mate.. Debbie, she's a LOON, a proper drinker & a great friend, she is also the Godmother of Ruby "Princess".. Now, I have a funny story about the Christening of my Princess.... & for my Post on UDI's to make any sense, I have to tell you about the Christening.

The morning of the Christening started very well, all the Godparents together, celebrating with a Bucks fizz, we all went to the church, Christened the "Princess" then went to the reception. I had booked the reception at a local social club until 5pm. Everybody was having such a lovely time that we decided to take the party back to our house... Drinks were flowing & everyone was in high spirits.. One of the Godmothers was laying on the floor playing with the "Princess", throwing her up & down, after a little while, Kerry put her down & she crawled off leaving Kerry still laying on the floor... At this, Debbie shouts My Turn & throws her self at Kerry, smashing heads but continuing straight over & smashing her nose on the floor. I at this time was in the down stairs toilet & as I came out could see blood everywhere.. I ask whats happened & Debbie turns around, saying that its all ok, that shes just got a nose bleed. NO.. That is no nose bleed, she had split it open. It took her daughter & me at least 10 minutes to convince her that she WAS going to hospital to get it looked at.
When we finally saw the doctor, he just looked at me & shook his head, the poor bloke didn't know where to start stitching, her nose was split in so many directions...

after this we would joke with her that the next time she comes down, we would notify the emergency services.. The next party she came to was the "Princess"'s 1st Birthday... & yes, she hurt herself... this time she fell backwards over a post
Leaving her with this lovely bruise...

Unfortunately, Debbie missed the 2nd Birthday but this weekend was the a double Birthday Party as it was the "Monsters" 1st & the "Princess"'s 3rd.... & guess what? Yep... Debbie ended up with another huge bruise, this time she slipped on the decking, landing on the arm of a chair... But she did stop the "princess" from hurting herself so it wasn't in vain... lol

I think the moral to this little story is either Debbie needs to stop coming down to visit or she needs to cut down on her drinking.. Ha ha ha

Wednesday, 15 August 2012

Egypt again & NO broken bones...

As some of you know, I went to Egypt in December & managed to snap my ankle away from my leg & shatter my leg in 20 places, leaving me with a plate in my leg & a completely fecked ankle.... This has meant I have to have another Op to correct the said fecked ankle. Because of this "Him in doors" decided to take me on holiday so that I could have a rest before the Op.. (Yeah right, Rest, ha ha ha) anyway, I said if we were going on holiday, then I wanted to go back to Egypt to the hotel where I had the accident so that we could see the friends that we had made... Needless to say, he agreed, well, it was a holiday for me.... Lol

So, I contacted our friend Ahmed who is a manager at the hotel & he did us a very good deal, I then booked the flights. After it was all sorted, I told the kids... Molly was very excited as she hadn't been on holiday with me & her dad in years & after her break up I think she needed something nice to look forward to. Boo was happy to be going back & the Ruby Princess was beside herself.... For the whole 13 days before we went, EVERYDAY she would ask me "Can we go now Mum" " Do we go NOW" so I made her a chart to tick off the days until it was time to go...

Well, the 23rd came & we were all ready to go. We woke the kids up & the first thing the Princess said was "Yay, let's go see Susan, Ahmed & Dr Hany" bless.. Excited much?? As we were leaving "Him in doors" did the usual.. "Have WE packed everything" YES "I" have packed everything... & I was even nice enough to pack your clothes that you couldn't even get out ready for me to pack.... We got to the airport & headed straight for a restaurant to get some breakfast, as we waited for the breakfast to come Molly & I did the compulsory "Duty free shopping" buying loads of things we don't actually need & plus the bottle of perfume that "Him in doors" always buys me.. The flight was ok... The Princess & the Monster were very good, the best on the plane actually... We arrive at Hurghada airport & we were met by our friend & the Doctor that looked after me when I had the accident there. The Princess nearly wet herself... She ran straight into his arms. We go to the hotel & book in... Seeing lots of the people that had helped us when we were there in December. Molly loved the service we got, cold drink & cold flannel to cool you down... We were taken to our rooms (joining rooms, not that I don't trust Boo & Mols but I felt happier having our rooms joining) they were huge & fully equipped.. With Coke, Fanta, 7Up & water in the frigdes & fruit on the table...

The first couple of days were great, I got to sit & "rest" but By the 3rd day, normal service had resumed... No rest for me... No lying in the sun, resting... I was up & down like a tarts draws... Trying to get the Princess in the pool & dealing with the Monster... Boo had made friends with the General Managers son so she was on the missing list, only seeing us to have her shower & get ready before she was off out with him again.... oh to be young again.

The holiday was lovely though, the food was as gorgeous as the first time, the cocktails were flowing & Molly & I had some nice bonding time... We played pool, had a few cocktails, went shopping & I fought off the waiters & chefs that were continuously asking her out.... One barman kept making her drinks with hearts on it.. Ha ha ha.

It came to the end of the holiday & I was left to do all the packing AGAIN.... For the life of me, I was stumped. How can the cases be so full still?? Minus a huge pack of nappies & the 2 big tubs of baby milk?? Oh well, I managed to pack it all... "Him in doors" helped, you know... "Have WE packed everything, did YOU remember....." you know how it is... We went to the lobby to book out & say good bye, I felt so sad, this was the first holiday that I didn't want to go home, usually by 10 days I'm ready to get home back to my creature comforts but I really didn't want to go home.

The flight home was as easy as it was going, the babies were so good, they made me very proud.. The "Princess" watched her Peppa Pig & the Monster smiled & waved at everybody... I'll be honest with you... I was dreading taking the kids on a plane but they were fantasic... If any of you want a fantastic hotel that's all inclusive, with fantastic people, then Sentido Crystal Bay in Hurghada, is the place to go.... Now to book our next holiday... ;oP

Wednesday, 4 July 2012

Having a reason to be proud...

In my life, so far, I have always been made proud by my sisters & children in my life for one thing or another that they have done & achieved... The feeling of proudness & overwhelming love has always amazed me... Last week I felt an ever bigger amount of overwhelming proudness & love... My 12 year old was given a day & half notice to compete for Hurdles... Against other Schools & she jumped at the chance to "help out" even though she had not had any training...(She came 4th out of 10)& My Toddler woke up REALLY early excited at doing a sponsored Toddle to raise money for "Children that don't have toys & love" (Bless her innocence) Both of my girls did me so proud that I was like the Cheshire cat....

It makes me wonder, I know I did things when I was younger that could have possibly made my parents proud but they never told me... I tell my children Every day that I love them & when they do BIG things that make me proud, I tell them, but what about the little things??? The princess gave up her bottles not to long ago & now is saying Good Bye to nappies & Pull ups, Boo tries sooo hard with her homework, & My eldest went to Oz, that made me so proud that she did it on her own (however scared me everyday) My Moo has changed her college to Brighton because she WANTS to work with animals.. All these things are big, I praise them... Am I missing the bigger picture????

I will be completely honest with you... I work with children with ADD, ADHD, Autism & Aspergers & every day I work with one of those children, I praise them, no matter how small.... Should I show my children the same praise?? Why, because those children have been labeled different do we feel easier to do so?? I was brought up in a world where children weren't praised for doing what what expected of them but that also begs the question, Do we expect to much from our children?? Should a child make it's own bed? Should a child be expected to clear the table? Should a child help out around the house? Or should they just be children????

I am going to try, for a week, to praise my kids for EVERYTHING that they do, I don't mean, going to the toilet or eating their dinner but the other things... Remembering to brush their teeth, putting their crap away when they have finished with it, etc....

Wish me luck, I feel this is going to be harder than I think..........

Thursday, 14 June 2012

Lovely Award...

Lovely Awards

Yesterday I was awarded this Lovely Award by The gorgeous, fantastic & inspirational @sthurley49. Who Who has been wonderful at helping me to start Blogging.. Her Blogs will have you in tears, some funny & some very moving...

The rules of this award are as follows:
1. Include the award logo somewhere in your blog.
2. Answer these 10 questions, below, for fun if you want to.
3. Nominate 5 or 6 blogs you enjoy. Or you pick the number.
4. Pay the love forward: Provide your nominee’s link in your post and comment on their blog to let them know they’ve been included and invited to participate.
5. Pay the love back with gratitude and a link to the blogger(s) who nominated you.

So without further ado, here are the questions and my answers.

1.What is your Favourite Colour?
My favourite colour without any hesitation is Red, I really can't tell you why, I just know that, thats the colour I love over all others, however, I wear mostly Black.. Ha ha ha

2. What is your favourite animal?
I am going to have to say two animals, I LOVE Giraffes & Otters both are so graceful & have the prettiest faces.

3. What is your favourite non alcoholic drink?
Now, anyone that knows me, knows I don't drink things like Coke or Tea or Coffee But I do drink WATER, until its coming out of my ears... Fizzy mainly.

4.Facebook or Twitter
I'm not to sure on this one... I love Facebook as it helped me get back into contact with so many old friends but Twitter as opened the door to many new & fantastic friends...

5.Favourite Pattern?
Favourite pattern, now thats an odd one... I Love Rennie Mackintosh's art, so I'll go with that..

6.Do you prefer getting or giving presents?

As I said in an earlier post, I LOVE giving presents, I love seeing the look on peoples faces when you give them something that they have always wanted... But I have to be honest to you, I REALLY LOVE getting presents too... Come on, who don't?

7.Favourite number?

Now, this is hard, I like a few numbers... 10 (Boo's bday) 13 just because it isn't unlucky for me, 17 (Maisie's bday) & 25 Princess's bday)....

8.Favourite day of the week?

Sunday... Growing up as a kid, that was the day ALL the family was together, all around a HUGE table, having a proper nice Roast... Now it's my little family's Lazy day...

9.Favourite flower?
I'm greedy, I love Orchids, Lillys & Irises.. Such beautiful flowers...

10.What is your passion?

MY CHILDREN.... I didn't even have to think about that, I have others but they are my world...

So there you go, my 10 questions all done. Now I have to nominate some more bloggers to receive this award. You don't have to answer the questions but please accept this award from me for being fab & always making me smile.... xxx

@NotSoSlummy Brilliant pictures, funny tweets & blogs..

@Ladyfuckwitt Brilliantly Funny Woman who makes me pee my pants ]

@HonestMummy Heart felt blogs with beautiful photos!/HonestMummy

@MinistryOfMum A woman that has me in STITCHES

@FeelEmFriday Brilliant blogs from REAL people fighting breast cancer or helping to raise awareness. Truely inspirational people.

There are so many Good Blogs out there but these are just a few... Happy reading... xx

Wednesday, 13 June 2012

Arrrrrrrrgh.... I DO know what I am talking about.

For those of you that don't know me, I had an accident back in December. I managed to snap my ankle away from my leg & shatter my leg.. How? I hear you ask... I missed a step. Yes, you heard right, I missed a step. We were in Egypt & it was our first night there. We had a lovely room but there were a few steps down into what would be the girls room. I was worried about the toddler hurting herself if she got up in the night so I decided to put her in bed with us as our bed was HUGE. I mean, this bed was so big we could have fitted the whole family in it. Anyway, we had dinner & an early night as we had been up very early, Boo went into her room, "Princess" Rubes, Me, "Him in doors" & the baby went into ours. We fell asleep pretty quickly but as Maisie was only 4 months old, she woke up for her nightly feed. It was about 3.45am.. After she had finished feeding, I laid back down to go back to sleep, but then The "Princess" started kicking me in the back closely followed by "Him in doors" calling the cows home with the loudest snore ever. After about 20mins of this, I had enough so went to go into Boo's room. As I walked down these beautiful marble steps in the dark, I misjudged the last step, "SNAP!!"

went the ankle, so loud it woke Boo up.. There was me, on the floor with my foot just.. Hanging... Needless to say, I went to the hospital & after a little argument with the Insurance people, they operated. The holiday continued & it was BRILLIANT. I got to lie around, in the sun,

with my own waiter asking me every half hour if I needed a drink or anything else while "Him in doors" ran around after the 3 kids. & I rekindled my love of Mojito's, well, I couldn't hurt myself, I was already Legless... Ha ha ha

We returned to England & I went straight to hospital to get it checked out & a new Cast fitted. After 8 LONG & painful weeks, they took the Cast off & I could walk on it, but not to much. 4 weeks later I went back in to have a bolt removed & a week later I had to go to see the Consultant again as something wasn't right. I could feel one of the pins, he told me that it HADN'T moved a that I should just take more pain killers. REALLY???? I am at home, on my own with the 2yr old & the baby & he wants me taking MORE pain killers... Errrrr, NO. I have been putting up with the pain & just getting on with it but today I had to go for my 6 weeks review after the removal of the bolt.

Guess what ???? Yes, the pin has moved, so much so that the ankle ISN'T fusing back with the leg, as the pin ISN'T holding them together because IT HAS MOVED!!!!! This means that I need another operation, so that they can put a plate on the ankle & a bone graph to help them fuse. As you can imagine, I am NOT happy. Why didn't they listen to me?? Surely, I know my own body.... Now I have to sit & decide whether I refuse the op & hope the bones fuse on their own or do I put my family through yet another worrying time of me having another operation then being laid up for another 8 weeks.

Thanks for listening o me rant & I hope you weren't to grossed out by the photos..

Love Me & my manky foot.. Xxx

Monday, 11 June 2012

Fallout from the fridge...

Growing up I was never one of those kids who had a fridge full of food & goodies.. Don't get me wrong, we had food in the fridge, wine & beer in case visitors came, food for dinners, condiments etc but the fridge was never FULL... We knew where everything went in the fridge & we put everything back in it's place (at our peril if we didn't as dad would moan if things weren't on the "Right shelves")
(NOT our Fridge growing up)

Now, we come to my fridge, I try to keep my fridge full, I have friends that just "Pop in" & Boo often brings friends home.. I myself, would like my fridge to be like my fridge was back home when I was growing up but that's not possible in this house.. No... It's chaos!!! on numerous occasions I have gone to take something out for dinner & had to become the Indian Goddess Kali with many arms to catch The stuff that comes flying out as if it is making a break for it's life. It appears that NOBODY in my house can put anything away properly, mainly because they are fecking lazy & are annoyed that the "Fairy" didn't come & do it for them. It's like they just "Throw it in". Even my friends that come around & bring beers or wine for parties, Just shove it in & hope for the best....
(Still, NOT our Fridge)

So today was no different, as I open the fridge to get the veg out of the draw, I take my life in my hands, a million & one things come flying out of there & I am like a whippet, grab here, catch there... But I under estimate the fridge... As I bend down to get the veg from the draw, a tub of cream comes flying off of the top shelf & misses me by an inch... Arrrrrgh. That'll be ME, mopping AGAIN...

Babies aren't babies for long..

My mum always says to people that Babies are not babies for long & I always used to look at her & think "Silly old cow" (Sorry mum) but recently I have began to realise what she means.
I have 5 children, 3 of them I gave birth too & 2 are my beautiful Step Daughters. I & M were 3 & 5 when I came into their lives so I didn't really have experience of them growing from babies.. & thinking back to when Boo was born, everything was a blur, we had so many problems when she was born that everyday was a milestone but 10 years later I had "Princess" Ruby.

When Ruby was born I was so happy, a new little baby.. She had grown tucked into my hip so they warned me that her hips hadn't grown properly & that she could possibly need an operation but we would know more as she got older & I wasn't to worry if she took longer than most babies to start crawling... Ruby grew like any other baby, she started teething, crawling & eating food like normal, she was a baby for as long as. Baby is a baby.. What was my mum talking about??? Then when Ruby was about 16 months old we found out that I was expecting again... 9 months later we had Maisie. Now I see what my mum means... This child does not stop, since the age of 6months she has tried her hardest to climb out of anything she is in.. The Rocking chair, the Moses basket & the Bouncy chair...
Now at 8 months it's her Walker & High Chair... not content with frightening the life out of me with this, she has started climbing up things, on Ruby's sponge chair

& now my friends stairs... She has also learnt "No" if we tell her No to something, she shakes her head at us, smiles & says.. " No, no, no.." & carries on with what she is doing.

She is to young to be doing all of this, surely?? Should she not still be laying in my arms, cooing & smiling up at me?? Both my Nan & my Mum laugh & tell me she is going to be trouble.. I think, for once, I actually believe them.... Lol

How old were your little'ns when they started climbing???

Monday, 4 June 2012

Age is nothing but a number...

This evening I went out to the cinema with my friend to see "What to expect when you're expecting", a funny film especially when you have had children & find yourself nodding at things that are relevant, like the heat & mood swings, the sore boobs & the NEED for drugs when giving birth.

My post isn't about child birth or what to expect when you are indeed expecting a baby but the age difference in "Him in doors" & myself. There is a part in the film where a YOUNG woman is married to Dennis Quaid (who is playing the father of another character) & when they go into the delivery suite the nurse asks if he is the woman's dad... Now, I have never had a problem with the 13yrs age difference between "Him in doors" & Me but we had our youngest Daughter's Christening in March & towards the end of it the barmaid came up to me to talk to me about the money we had left behind the bar. She comes up to me, all smiles, bouncy & happy. "Hi, just need to tell you quickly, the money that was put behind the bar, by your DAD I think, well, there is only £56 left." at this, I started to laugh hysterically, she looks perplexed, as if I've gone made & asks me if I'm alright, when I finally stop laughing & pull myself together, I thank her for not only making me laugh but for pointing out that I don't look old... Then tell her that "My Dad" is actually "Him in doors" poor girl didn't know what to say, she sheepishly apologised & returned to the bar.... This, as you know, delighted me, so, I had to share it... With EVERYBODY at the christening..

This isn't the first time our age difference has been brought up, my 2 Step Daughters often joke that their dad was 13 when I was being born, much to his annoyance & I think embarrassment too sometimes. He is only a couple of years younger than my Dad & my Step Dad & the same age as my Aunt, which can be quite odd at family parties or when my dad comes to stay & they go to the pub for a beer & as I've said, it hasn't ever been a problem, we are no Michael Douglas & Catherine Zeta Jones nor are we J Howard Marshall & Anna Nicole Smith.. Although, I'm sure the money was a bigger prospect to them ladies than the sexual attraction... I myself fell for "Him in doors" not for his money, I just like OLD things... Ha ha ha.

Friday, 1 June 2012

When You've got to be sick, you've got to be sick...

In my last post I told you of my Holiday with my Best Friend SJ to Majorca, but when she read the post she told me that I had missed loads out, In fact, I hadn't, I just knew I was going to write another one to tell you some more about Our First Holiday WITHOUT our parents...

Now, you know what its like, you get drunk, go to bed whenever you want, throw your clothes on the floor & leave your stuff lying around. Now its the getting drunk bit I want to tell you about, you know that we started drinking as soon as we hit the airport & you know we were stupid enough to go off with a STRANGE man to find "The Tunnel" but there were days/night in between that, that were equally funny... Like the time we went to a bar for some lunch & to watch the telly to see who had one the new PM's job.. The bar seemed nice enough, clean, tidy, cheap food & drink, everything you would want. It was all going well until I needed to go to the toilet, I asked behind the bar & they pointed over to the corner, off I went to the toilet when I stopped dead, There was indeed a toilet but if he a glass door (one of the doors with the fuzzy glass, so you can see but you cant SEE) & there was somebody in there, I quickly made my way back to our table, "Sar, go to the loo & look but don't make it obvious" "Why?" "Because the door is glass & you can see some bloke in there, Ha ha ha" Well, could you believe it, needless to see, I didn't go to the toilet there nor did we go back...

Then there was the time we went to the Night club down the road & literally walked into a Foam Bath.. We couldn't see a bloody thing but boy, what fun, some warning would have been nice though as I don't think we would have worn White tops... we got back from the club, some of the waiters were still in the bar, there was this one waiter that had really taken a liking to Sarah (he would often call out to her as we were sun bathing.) We sat & had a drink with them & he asked Sarah if he could throw her in the pool.. "Whats it worth" she answered. He told her that she could have a free drink.. "Make it a bottle of Malibu & your on" Sooooo, after negotiations they agreed that he could throw her in for a bottle of Malibu. We go out side & he grabs her up.. "Hang on, hang on" she screams, I have to take my Shoes off, They can get ruined... & then SPLASH.. She was in. As you can imagine, we were very drunk & thought this very funny. I'm not to sure the other guests staying there thought the same

Anyway, the next morning dawned on us, I say morning, by the time we actually stopped drinking & went to bed it was around 5.30am, So went didn't get up until at least 2pm. We felt rough.. we looked rough.. We attempted to get up & sort ourselves out, Sarah was in the bathroom putting her make up on after her shower when I ran in, head straight down the toilet.. Talking to God on the Big White Telephone... Poor Sarah, stuck, in the same room, fingers in her ears singing & humming at the top of her voice so not to hear me... In a break from throwing up & look at her & shout. "Run, Quick, there's more coming" SJ rans from the room, straight outside on the balcony & shuts the door.. Faintly from the distance I can still hear her singing to herself... After I had finished & had a shower, it was down to the bar again to collect her bottle & have a hair of the dog.. I have to say, I'm not to sure I would have let someone throw me in the pool fully clothed for a bottle of Malibu.. Ha ha ha

Thursday, 31 May 2012

The "Tunnel" is NOT a club...

In 1997 I went on holiday with my best friend Sarah, we went to Majorca for two weeks... The holiday started at 9.30 that morning as we arrived at the Airport. We went for a McDonalds breakfast before the flight & thought it a good idea to add Vodka to our Orange juices.. Start as you mean to go on & all that... Well, it was our first holiday on our own.

SJ has ALWAYS been a lover of shoes, every kind of shoes but mostly HIGH ones... Anyway, she had decided that her new HIGH, brown, patchwork Wedges were the shoes to be worn. we should have foreseen then that perhaps these were not the right shoes for walking on & off of a plane in after quite a few Vodka's... Going out was a rush to the plane & trying to run in wedges isn't easy, people were laughing & to be fair it made me chuckle too but not as much as the leaving the plane did... We had obviously had a few more drinks on the plane & we were quite merry, tipsy, sloshed, whatever you want to call it.. Ha ha ha. So, the plane lands & it's time to leave the plane but instead of there being a bridge, there is the stairs, SJ' face was a picture.. "I can't get down them in these" I told her to take them off them but Noooooo, she couldn't do that. I went first & she stood at the top just calling out "Help me sweetie, don't leave me" "sweetie, please, don't leave me" everybody was watching & laughing, I could help her as I was laughing too much. She finally got down & we continued on our holiday.

The hotel was nice & our room turned out to be an apartment. We put the cases in then went to the bar, as you do.. The next day we went by the pool & started talking to a gay couple (god, I've just realised, I always manage to find the gays on holiday, should change my name to faghag.. ;oP ) They were from Brighton & we got on really well with them.. We did the usual stuff that day, swam, sunbathed etc when later that day we spotted a little German kid being thrown in the pool by his dad, this poor lad was beside himself.. " Nein, nein, nein" called this lad as he got thrown in.. Then glug, glug, glug as the kid just went to the bottom of the pool. Sarah & I both jumped up ready to get in & get him (well, she would have, at the time, I had a fair of deep water) Anyway, the lads dad finally jumps in & gets him.. This amazed us & still does to this day, why, if you child really doesn't want you to do it & obviously can't swim, why would you throw him in??
To be fair, they weren't the only nutty Germans there either, we were sat on our balcony one afternoon & we saw this little German girl, just standing & dancing, no music, nothing, nowhere near music or anyone come to think of it... I told SJ that she reminded me of her.. Ha ha ha

Of an evening we would go for a wonder & this one night we ended up in a night club. We got talking to some bloke who told us that he would really like to take us to "The Tunnel" I wasn't to sure about this but SJ thought that maybe it was a club & that we were together so we would be ok... Eventually we went, on the drive to this "Tunnel" I started to worry, we didn't know where we were, who we were with & where we were going... He stopped at his house to pick something up & I told Sarah what I was thinking, she assured me that we would be ok as she had her "Huge brown wedges" on & she could hit him with them if he tried anything funny.. He got back in the car & gave us perfume each, very odd, but we took it so not to offend & we set off again, the journey took ages, still no club in sight.. Finally after about 3hrs we arrived in another village, city, whatever it was, & there was no "Tunnel" we asked him where the club was & he looked puzzled, "There is no club, this, this is the Tunnel" & pointed at a tunnel we had driven through. It transpired that it was a mountain that separated the two cities & that they had made it into a "Tunnel" Sarah & I just burst into fits of laughter, all that worry, all that time in the car for a bloody Tunnel... Martin took us back to our hotel & offered to take us out the next night, we thanked him but declined... Thinking about it now, we were so stupid, never would I do something like that now & I hope & prey that my daughters have enough sense not to do anything so dangerous but it is funny when we talk about it....

Wednesday, 30 May 2012

Twirly's arrival

Last night I was reminded of something I said to someone after I had given birth to MY first born that made me laugh.. Let me tell you about having Boo..

Having Boo wasn't as easy as they told me it would be.. At 31wks I started to get pains. It was a saturday morning & we were moving house, I wasn't doing to much as I was obviously very pregnant. We moved in & I went off to work as usual, I had a little part time job in my friends Pub. It was a busyish shift, we had the football lot in & the time went quite quickly but I was still getting these pains, not to bad but enough to stop me in between serving.. My shift finished & I went home to my new place.
Once home I cleaned the bathroom (not that it needed it but you know what its like when you move into a new house) then I ran a bath & made my bed.. "Him in doors" ordered a take away & I had an early night.. I woke up about 4am in terrible pain, It felt like someone was stabbing me & twisting the knife.. I tried to wake him but all I got was "It's Braxton Hicks" & he fell back to sleep... I got up as I couldn't sleep & I started putting my Hospital bag together, god knows why but it came in handy in the end.. By 6am I was in to much pain & rang my Aunt, I would have rung my mum but my dad was a Postman & hated being woken up early on his day off... Anyway, she told me to go straight to the hospital to get checked out..
I woke him up & we made our way there. Once there they put all sorts of monitors on me & checked me over.. In the end they were going to send me home, UNTIL I hemorrhaged.. They had given me all sort of pain killers & I felt right out of it at the time & started to giggle.. "Oops, I think I've wet myself, Oh no, wait, its ok, its just BLOOD" As you can imagine, this sent the doctors & nurses into a panic & "Him in doors" went white as a sheet.. They quickly asked me to sign something & the next thing I know, I'm on a table & they are trying to stick something in my back..(spinal epidoodle) I can remember looking at the Anesthetist & shouting to him "Oi, Oi, Just because I'm off my face & numb down there, don't think I won't know if your perving" God Knows to this day why I said it but I did.. Lol

Boo was born, weighing 3lb 2oz & they took her straight to SCBU.. I remember being on the ward & screaming at the nurse when she brought me a photo... "I don't want a sodding photo, I want to see my Baby" Slamming my legs up & down on the bed to show that they worked (I couldn't feel a thing but they didn't need to know that) eventually she gave in & let "Him in doors" take me down to see her. I had just got her in my arms when my nan came rushing in, pushing Past the mother in law & took her off of me.. She was crying & telling me how proud she was, My grandad was there too, which is a VERY big deal as he doesn't do hospitals. From that day, he has ALWAYS called her Twirly because she came to early & because she was The Daughter of my Grandad's Curly.. Me!

It was a couple of days later & my Sister & her best friend came to the hospital to visit me & see the baby..... My Sister told me that she had gone to Mothercare to buy a bib that she had seen for the baby & then what her friend had said to her at the time.. My Sister: "I need to go to Mothercare to buy something for my Sister & the baby, a bib" My Sisters friend Lisa: "ABIB, that's a funny name to call a baby" This still makes me chuckle to this day... Anyway, after she told me this Lisa asked me "How does it feel now you are a Mummy?" & apparently, my reply, as she told me last night, was, "Like a COW, with too much MILK" Ha ha ha.. Sounds just like something I would say.. I also apparently rang everybody telling them that I had, had the baby but I was still off my face & didn't remember. One of my Best friends Toni arrived at the hospital with the HUGEST balloon I have ever seen, I was shocked to see her & asked if "Him in doors" had rang her but she told me, that it had been me.. Proper off my face on drugs.. A few others turned up as well, apparently, I had rang them too.. Ha ha ha

Tuesday, 29 May 2012

Mum... I've got Food Tech TOMORROW!!!!

Number 3 Daughter (of 5) is now at secondary school, she started last September. She seems to be enjoying it & her grades are very good... This term is her turn to do Food Technology. They split the lessons between the classes per terms. She seemed quite excited about doing it but I am at a loss as to why they are NOT actually COOKING...

So far they have had to take Citrus Fruit in to "Make some Juice".. Now Boo comes into me TONIGHT & tells me that she need Fruit to make a Fruit Cocktail.. TOMORROW! Oh & that they have to take a cake into school on Thursday with Icing, Sprinkles etc, to decorate it for the Jubilee. This is another thing that has wound me up... WHY do they have to take in an 8" cake, Icings, Sprinkles & other bits to decorate a cake that WE, as in US at home, are NOT going to eat???

When I started Secondary school & had Food Tech, we had to COOK loads of things, It was fun, the prepping, the measuring, getting in a mess while putting it all together & smelling it as it cooked.. I made a Cottage Pie, Corned Beef Hash & a few other things in my first year... NEVER did I have to just CUT UP Fruit. I would often go home after a lesson, with my parents waiting for their dinner & having an empty tub as most of the people in the class had ate my food... (The most memorable dish was my Spag Bol, which the WHOLE class ate, even the teacher)

I was talking to my Mum about this & the fact that Boo ALWAYS leaves it until the night before to tell me that she needs the things to make her dish.. But apparently, My Sister was exactly the same, Thinking back I remember her doing it. It used to make me laugh.. I had always knew that Boo was like my Sister but this is getting silly now...

I know I am not alone in this & that there are more Mums & Dads out there that have kids that leave it until the last minute too.. So I put it to you, How do you do it, How do you find the ingredients at the last minute? Do you magic them out of thin air or pull them out from your arse??? Ha ha ha.

Monday, 28 May 2012

Never under estimate the power of an Upset Woman...

I heard some sad news a week ago, some people that I am very close to have broken up.. She says she is fine, that they were growing apart etc etc.. But I know in my heart that she is hurting & there is nothing I can do but be there for her. I guess it is apart of life & growing old, you fall in love with being in love, you break up, you meet someone else, they become your life, so on & so on until you find that ONE TRUE LOVE. But why does it have to hurt so much in between? Why do we have to have our hearts ripped out & stamped on? I myself find that revenge always helps me feel better...

Over my years I have had a fair few SHITS in my life, thinking that its OK to cheat on me, to let me down or just treat me like shit.. I in turn have found ways to get my own back...

Lets Start with "R" He was my Boyfriend when I was 17.. & the guy I thought was "The One" if you know what I mean but apparently he had other ideas as he was everybody else's "One" too... From my girlfriends to girls from my School... He thought I didn't know & so did they, I didn't say a word for a couple of days but obviously stopped sleeping with him.. Then put pepper in all of his boxers.. Can you picture it?? Copious amounts of scratching, needless to say, this sent the girls he was knocking off running away from him & straight to the doctors.. Kerpow.. *blows the imaginary smoke from finger tips*

Then there was "K" He was lovely but was sooo unreliable it's unreal. He would let me down & lie to me so much that one day I had enough, I took his tooth brush & cleaned the bathroom with it.. ALL of the bathroom..
Then there was "J" he would put me down, try to make me feel bad about myself so I made him a DOG FOOD pie for our parting meal... after "J" there was a couple of weeks that I was still in a vengeful mood, so I popped back home to visit my mum, who was still living in Bromley... It had been at least 2yrs since "R" had taken my Heart & stomped on it & in fairness I was "Over it" but as I said, I was in a vengeful state of mind. I had changed a lot & I knew I looked good, my hair was really long, my boobs were BIGGER & I had put some weight on & my body didn't look like a bag of bones... Obviously, this caught "R's" eye... For the next 2wks I shagged the life out of him, I quote "Omg, this is the best sex I have EVER had, why did we split up, I've missed you so much" then I left, went back to Kingston, never spoke to him again(well, I did, many years later but that's a different story), didn't answer his calls, emails or letters...

Then there was "G" another bloke that thought it ok to cheat on me, well, that was until I sent EVERYBODY in his work naked photos of him... Not a good look let me tell you.
This then brings me to "Him in doors" Now don't get me wrong, I love him & he isn't that bad, NOW. I meet him when I was 19 & I fell for him hard... But he, when we were younger, found it very hard to be honest to me, he would lie about going to the pub, he would keep things from me etc. On my 20th Birthday, he was going to "Cook me a romantic dinner" but about 5pm, he rang & told me he was stuck in traffic, he wasn't, he was in the pub, When I found out, I took the dinner that I had ended up cooking & put it in between all of his clothes that were at my place & put them in black bags.. I Obviously left him, but things are never that clear cut & we did end up together again... Now, when he lies or let's me down, to make me smile, I move his things, Car keys, Wallet, shoes, you know what I mean, he puts his keys down on the table, I move the to the dresser, he puts his shoes by the door, I put them in the shoe box... I know this is very petty but it makes me smile.. maybe, the next time your partner upsets you, try it, move their tooth brush from the usual place, put the cup they have just got out, back into the cupboard while they are distracted, even change the recording time on the sky box.. All the little things that will drive them mad but make you smile.. But don't get caught.. Lol..

Thursday, 24 May 2012

Is a Bully really a Bully?

I'm quite "Tickled Pink" that my baby sister (one of the three) LOVES my posts, she reads them after her incredibly hard day at work that she has, Teaching Children/Teens with learning disabilities... (For which I am very Proud of)(Follows in her sisters foot steps ;o))

We haven't always been close, in fact, growing up I wanted to kill her more than cuddle her. She was a "Bitch" with the capital "B".. She would do whatever she could to get ME in to trouble, she would tell our parents (I say ours but "our" Dad was actually hers, he is my Step Dad but every much a dad as my own) that I had hit her, she would steal my things & make a mess that I would ALWAYS have to clear up... But never the less, she was is my Baby Sister.

Now, being that she is my sister & seeing as I said, when she was born that I would ALWAYS look out for her... When she started being bullied at school, I saw RED... I don't like Bullies at the best of times but when you start on one of MY OWN then you really are going to get it "FULL BARREL..."
Anyway, I think she was either in the 1st year or the second year of Secondary school when one day, messing about she started whimpering as I tackled her to the ground (Not a regular occurrence) I asked her what was wrong & she told me that she was fine & that there was "NOTHING to worry about" I didn't listen to her, I KNEW she was keeping something from me so I tackled her to the ground again & pulled off her tights.. All up her leg was bruises.. A OLDER girl at school had been KICKING her in the back of the leg to get her OUT of the Dinner Line... I really Lost it.. After a fair few hours she finally told me the girls name (if I promised NOT to beat her up). Soooooooo, I went to the school the next day, Now, it had been a while since I had left but I had always still "Popped In" every now & then. I did my usual, "Hellos" to all of the teachers, Deputy & Head, then I went to find this girl.. I found a couple of my sisters friends & made them point this Older girl out.. When I say older, I don't mean by a couple of months, this girl was 2 years older than my Baby, So, me being 2 years older than her, it made it fair game... I went up to this girl, asked her if she was the girl, she, with Attitude, grunted at me that "Yeah, that's me" at this, I grabbed her hand & twisted it behind her back, I held it high enough to hurt but NOT to break (as I'm NOT a bully) & I informed her that if she was to EVER lay a finger on my Sister AGAIN, I would not only come & break her fingers but I would take them & shove them so far down her throat that she would shit them....(See, I DIDN'T beat her) Funny enough, she never did bully ANYONE ever again... Later that day my Sisters head of year came & asked me if I had threatened her but I just told him straight.. "No, I didn't threaten her, I told her what WOULD happen if she touched my Sister AGAIN"....

I Thank my lucky stars that I now deal with "Bullies" differently, In my line of work, I deal with the children that are usually the "Bullies", I have since learnt that it is the way their life is, that dictates the way they are with others... My one request is that you all think twice before acting AGAINST Bullies... Yes, what they do is HORRIBLE to your child but what is their home life like, make no mistake, I DON'T condone Bullies, I merely think now.. xx

Who doesn't love PRESENTS...

I have spent my life trying to please people & for the life of me I can't think why, it's in complete conflict to ME!! (if you know what I mean.) I am a very BLUNT, up front person, I don't have any problems in telling people exactly who or what they are... But for some stupid reason, I also like to make people smile. How odd is that??

I've been like this since I was little, I would try to do my Nans housework to make her happy as she had been working all day. I would also give her mini pedi's too. I would help my mum get dinner ready after her hard day at work.. Help friends out if they needed it, look after my cousins on a weekend so that my Aunt could go out. As I got older it grew to presents... I LOVE buying presents for people, I love to see their faces when they open something that they have wanted. My baby sister for one. Her 16th birthday for example. She came to stay with me & "Him in doors" the night before her birthday so that she could wake up at mine.. We got a take away, which we didn't have very often growing up, then we watched films & vegged. In the morning I made sure her present was on her bed.. I say present, it was one of them & a little decoy. She looked so excited... She ripped open the present & her face was a picture. I had brought her 5 Cd's. Her face dropped, she thanked me as you do but she looked a little sad. "What's up darlin?" I asked, "I like them but I don't have a CD player to play them on.." "You could play them on Mums one" was my answer, trying not to smile, yes, you guessed it, I had brought her a CD player but that was for later. We carried on with our day, I took her shopping & we had lunch then I got a phone call from my friend, he was going to have a barbie & invited us along. We hopped on a bus & made our way there, as we sat there & handed her the second present. "What's that?" "It's a present." "But I already had a present from you." as she opened it her face was amazing... The HUGEST smile I have ever seen... This made me so happy inside. My love for giving presents continued, at Christmas I would buy my family presents that I knew would make them happy.. One year I brought my nephews remote controlled cars, car in a can they were called. They asked for clues as all kids do & my answer was as follows.. It's round but square, it's small but it's big, it's slow but it's fast.. & so on. This is the present that they talk about the most.

I'm going to fast forward now to my sisters 21st.. As usual, I had spent ages sorting out her presents... As it was her 21st I had 21 of them for her to open. Each & everyone of them was either something that she wanted or something from our childhood.. The biggest one was a Tiffany's bracelet, she had wanted one since "Him in doors" brought me one after our Boo was born. I had always promised her one for her 21st but a couple of weeks before, I told her that I couldn't afford it & that I was really sorry.. She completely understood, I was at college, I had Boo & things were tight. Anyway, it came to the day of her birthday & she was having a party, I suggested that she spent the day with me & that I helped her get ready for the evening. In the afternoon, we sat down with a glass of champagne & I gave her the presents.. 19 in total.. Not 21.. She was sooo happy, she started opening them & we laughed & reminisced about things we used to do when growing up. There were films that we used to watch, drinks we used to have, super noodles because that's what we would eat while watching the films & things like that.. Now... It was time for the BIG one.. At this point we were nearly ready, I had done her make up & her friends were there, I gave her the birthday card but forgot that I had put the card from Tiffany's inside.. As she opened it, her face changed, it was a mixture of excitement & sadness. "You can't afford this & you've already brought me loads of presents" "I have been buying your presents for months now & I was NEVER not getting your bracelet, now stop crying, you're going to mess up your make up" it was time to get going & the door bell went, "Meish, get that please,it'll be the cab" knowing full well it wasn't, I had ordered a Limo to take her to the party,(her final present, totaling 21) her friends stood outside to see her face.. We walked out & her mouth dropped open.. & yes, she started crying AGAIN.. Lol. We picked her best friend Simon (who's birthday it was too) & made our way to the party with a pit stop to the shop to get more Champers...

See, I'm a big softy at times, my eldest step daughter was 18 a couple years ago, which means she 21 next year... She got 18 presents to open & I'm pretty sure there will be 21 on her 21st unless she opts for something else like my youngest step daughter, she is 18 this year & really wants a car... Little does she know, we will be telling her that we can't afford it but there will be a car with a HUGE Red bow on it... :o)